1-101: A History, and an imagined transcription of a real conversation.

M[iranda]: "Hey."

m[ark]: "I'm so sorry, that was the slowest response ever to an ASAP message. Are we even friends anymore? Can you possibly forgive me?"

M: "Funny you should put it that way. This conversation feels extremely illicit as of late. How's Laura?"

m: "Good. Good. So there's no emergency?"

M: "No, there is. There's not. I need a favor."

m: "A big favor?"

M: "Not a big favor."

m: "Hmm. I'm intrigued."

M: "Okay...I need you to meet Chase. I mean, I need him to be okay with you. No, wait! I need him to be okay with me, and you are part of me. This is serious. You are my version of 'my parents', not that you are my dad, because that would be gross."

m: "Ha ha! Yes, revolting. Not to say I wouldn't delight in having a daughter like you, I'm just not a huge fan of throwing up in my own mouth on a regular basis."

M: "Yes. Yes of course. Not many are."

m: "So, is Ms. Moure's little 'list' catching up with her? Is that what I'm hearing? I feel like that's what I'm hearing."

M: "Mark? We're not crazy, are we? I mean, we blog and like bourbon. We both delight in midday beers and greasy food, albeit considerably less greasy as the years have gone on. Okay, yeah: we have a history, but fuck it, no? Doesn't everyone have a history? Ours is just less complicated than most. That's the only difference I see."

m: "Right. You seem spot on: of course I'm not the one who's not going to agree with you."

M: "Right. That's why we need dinner. Soon. Early next year. Seriously, pencil me in, and I promise I wont write the event into my moleskine as "Dinner With Dad".

m: "That's mildly funny. But the gag reflex..."

M: "Okay, I'll stop. Promise."

m: "Yes. This is good. On all counts. What are you thinking?"

M: "I'm thinking that if this gets out of hand, I could lose 5 of my 9 preset speed dials. I mean, people do this, right? I mean, probably a good 30% of my current friends are in the same situation as you and I, and if you add even 2 degrees of Kevin Bacon, it could reach upwards of 75-95%. That's a lot."

m: "I meant more like in destination, but yes I concur: even but two degrees of Kevin Bacon can make things pretty sexy."

M: "Right. On all counts. Your choice. Put it together. Anything. Anywhere with food and beer."

m: "Right. I'll shoot you a line."

M: "Perfect."

m: "Good talking to you, Ms. M. Be in touch."

M: "Kay. Late."


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