2.20.2012

You'd be surprised how hard it can be to be this easy.

As the bulk of my list was built in the seven-by-seven-mile peninsula that is San Francisco, My newly acquired New York singledom is most easily compared to my time there. My thoughts? New York makes being promiscuous so very, very, easy. No pun intended.

Por ejemplo? Time for a list.

1. The Subway.
There's no post-coital cab sharing, no awkward and outside bus transfers from the uptown to the crosstown to the all over town, and no cliff-like hills to climb in last nights' heels. The Train of Shame is so much preferable to it's counterpart walk.

2. Smartphones.
Okay, this isn't really New York specific, but rather time-period specific, but let's just pause and appreciate how the smartphone and it's GPS helps any youngling traverse the miles back home when everything looks different in the daylight and you can't remember which way you came.

3. Planned Parenthood.
I'm just saying that I have never seen a bowl of condoms that big in my entire life, even at any other Planned Parenthood anywhere. And hey, condoms are expensive. I could go on and on about how Planned Parenthood of New York can make your sex life better, but I've pretty much already covered it here and here.

4. Your receptionist at work.
Okay this one is probably just me. Okay, this one is definitely just me, but sometimes you're standing on the train platform and you realize it's a holiday and you fear you're going to be devastatingly late to work, and yet somehow the train is right there, and you make your first transfer quickly and perfectly like it never actually happens but you always wish it would, and then instead of the F the C pulls up at Essex and takes you 4 (long) blocks closer to work than you thought you'd get and you end up getting there 5 minutes early. And maybe on this same day, the receptionist looks over at you, winks, and plays Big Pimpin' over the PA, and you wonder how she could possibly be so clairvoyant, and I want to love her.

But me give my heart to a woman?
Not for nothin', never happen.

I'll be forever mackin'.
--M

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